This isn’t such a bizarre question as it might first appear. OK, we know that Jeremy is neither permatanned or the parent of Mark Durden-Smith (shudder), but we have had a realisation about his similarity to the former goddess of ITV.
We watched Top Gear last night (27 December, 7.45pm, BBC Two). In fact, we enjoyed watching it so much that we are currently watching the repeat (28 December, 7.45pm, BBC Two) as well.
This doesn’t happen much. Normally, if you miss an episode of Top Gear, you can live with it. Or you can watch for it to be repeated ad infinitum on Dave at some point.
But we’ve found that we’re glued to the screen whenever Top Gear does one of its one-off specials – where “the lads” go off somewhere exotic and drive a bit, banter a lot, and act like the Famous Five.
That’s if the Famous Five were three middle-aged blokes travelling around with a production team, cameramen, and mechanics.
Never mind the artificial conceit that they’re all alone, stranded in a foreign country – these programmes are travelogues and entertainment in one. We learned more about Vietnam in a previous special than we’d ever learned before. We’ve also enjoyed specials set in Botswana and the Arctic Circle.
And in this latest episode, we learned about Bolivia. We learned about the Death Road with its tight bends, vertigo-inducing views and narrow stretches, which has crosses along its length to mark those who have died on its dangerous route.
We learned about wildlife, the Atacama Desert, and the Chilean Pacific Coast. We learned about the effects of altitude on people and vehicles.
Those who have complained that Top Gear is becoming less about cars and more about personalities may be right. But that may not be a bad thing.
These special episodes are entertaining travel programmes – not car shows. But we no longer have the travel programmes that we grew up with – Holiday on BBC One and Wish You Were Here? on ITV – the latter hosted by the chirpy Ms Chalmers. There is clearly a gap in the terrestrial schedules for informative programmes on far-flung places.
OK, you can catch reruns of Lonely Planet on satellite – if you’re lucky, you may get one hosted by the fantastic Ian Wright (no – not the footballer-cum-presenter of the criminally crap Live At Studio Five or whatever it’s called), even if it’s now been renamed.
You may also catch various people trying to flog you cruise holidays on Sky. But it’s not the same. We need travel programmes back on peak-time terrestrial telly.
We think Top Gear works well as a travelogue hosted by three inept petrolheads. And that makes Clarkson the new Chalmers… only armed with a Range Rover rather than a white-toothed grin.
